Just watched the red wedding. I actually started sobbing like guttural sounds were coming from my mouth sobbing. It took me so long to comprehend what was going on in the books and ugh. Now this. Anyway.
- JESSE EISENBERG: People on the street say mean things to me.
- INTERVIEWER: Like what?
- JESSE EISENBERG: I get called Napoleon Dynamite because I have curly hair. I live in New York City and I ride a bicycle. I always bike down 9th Avenue and there’s this kid who goes to school there named Abraham. Every time I pass him, he calls me Napoleon Dynamite. He screams it out and his friends laugh. That was a fine movie but I wasn’t in it.
- INTERVIEWER: What do you say back?
- JESSE EISENBERG: I say, “Please Abraham, I’m not that man.”
Yesterday this creep was rubbing himself against me on the subway and it took me forever to realize what he was doing. And then it took me a few train stops to unfreeze from the shock and shove him back with my elbow and then he got out in the next station. It made me so fucking mad. Like, I don’t know what was worse, what he was doing or the fact that I didn’t punch him in the goddamn face.